The Missus Diaries

Behind the facade that is me, I've been feeling very down on a subconscious level for the last 2 days. It's not like i cannot function, just the sadness is constantly floating there. It made me sleep bad the last 2 nights.. I slept but kept getting jolted awake by dreams... I dreamt of other ppl's children. I dreamt of my friends getting bfps. I dreamt of my friend giving birth. And one image that was ingrained on my mind was the one I saw when I opened the bedroom door to my BFF's confinement Center. It was a very very nice and luxurious one btw. On Friday I went to visit her and when I went it I saw her hugging her baby so closely and protectively. I felt very happy and full of love for her. But at the same times it made me feel like melting into a mess on the floor. When I close my eyes I keep seeing her like that and it made me really scared that this would never be me. Will I ever succeed? Will we be childless? What if we fail? It's easy to say I can l...